Change is here to stay; we’ve all gotten that point by now.
The ability to “embrace change” is necessary for success; some claim it is the actual secret of success. We’ve heard that too. But, for those facing career change, personal re-invention, or entrepreneurial endeavors, the “how-to” of embracing change is still a big secret.
Learning to consistently step out of our comfort zones, open our arms and hearts to the great unknown, and give ‘whatever happens’ a big bear hug is a huge task. As with any task however, it may be easier in smaller pieces.
If it’s all about attitude, how do we shift our attitudes about change?
1) Change, even positive change, is risky. The first step in embracing any change is admitting the risks – the risks of failure and of success. We each have different ‘buttons’. It is important to know which ones control our resistance to change. Often, resistance stems from real or perceived losses we could suffer to our identity, our relationships, or our pocketbook. Every change in life starts with an ending…and ends with a new beginning. Recognizing what we could, or will, be leaving behind – even an outgrown version of ourselves – is one part of opening to change.
2) Then there’s the space between the old and the new. Another step is accepting a process of moving toward a destination. In a society of fast food, instant entertainment, and tweeting, any process like learning, growing, or becoming, is rather foreign. An “instant” attitude about change implies we have to move at lightning speed and must know precisely where we are going and how to get there, before we jump. A process gives us time along the way – and that means time to learn what we need to move forward, time to figure next steps out, and time to adjust as we go. That can be a big relief.
3) Control is only an illusion. Redefining control is a major leap toward hugging change. From hurricanes, to economic crisis, to aging – we should be getting the idea that we really don’t have control over many things we thought we did. Admitting that we aren’t in control, even when we maintain our status quo, is a very personal step. It involves examining and building a different kind of trust. Trusting in ourselves, in life, or in a benevolent power are a few starters.
4) We are not alone. Hang around people who have a little “attitude” already. Identify those who have shown how to embrace change and follow them. Read, study websites, talk with them if possible – just hang out virtually or in real time with role models for stepping out and hugging the unknown. BTW, staying surrounded by people who are change-resistant is a sure-fire technique for staying stuck.
5) Want a new attitude. Wanting to shift our attitudes– wanting to learn how to embrace change – is vital. Inviting a whole new attitude can open us to a whole new world.
Cheryl Lynn Dratler, Master Career Counselor and Mental Health Counselor can be reached at CLDworkshops@gmail.com
